HYPNOTHERAPY
AND RELATIONSHIPS.
What
are the main causes of relationship problems?
In my hypnotherapy practice I find most relationship problems are
the result of faulty communication between two people.
We bring attitudes and reactions from the past-
especially from childhood relationships with parents- to
our present day adult relationships. But our partner has
had a different childhood, and does not understand. It
is even harder for partners to understand each other
when they are both angry.
What
is the origin of such problems?
A word or a look may be enough to transport us back to the
helpless rage we first experienced in childhood.
A loving relationship can feel unfamiliar- even
uncomfortable- to someone who has suffered abusive
relationships in adult life.
Some people guard themselves against "dangerous"
emotions, such as fear and rage, so effectively that all
emotion, even love, is automatically suppressed.
So
how can these problems be helped by Hypnotherapy?
Hypnotherapy can help people to calm themselves, control their
anger, and talk instead of shouting. Hypnotherapy can
help to identify the "buttons" that,
when accidentally pressed, set off the anger and
resentment that sabotage relationships.
What
are the limitations of hypnotherapy for relationship
problems?
Neither
hypnotherapy nor any other psychotherapy can help if one
or both partners are determined to destroy their
relationship.
Occasionally
I am approached by men wanting me to hypnotise their
wife or partner so that they can question them under
hypnosis to find out if they have been unfaithful. I
absolutely REFUSE
to do this. In these cases it is the man who needs
hypnotherapy, not the woman. And even if the man agreed
to receiving hypnotherapy himself, there is no
“quick-fix” solution to such excessive jealousy and
paranoia.
Some
men suppose that hypnotherapy might induce a woman to be
more submissive, sexually or otherwise. Again, I
absolutely REFUSE
to
use hypnotherapy for this purpose. To do so would be a
misuse of hypnotherapy. Likewise, I am not prepared to
use hypnotherapy to cause anyone to fall in love with
anyone else if they have not already done so.
What
is the best way for someone to find a relationship in
the first place?
Stop
looking! In my experience, most good relationships start
while people are doing something else. Rather than
desperately seeking someone, it is better to enjoy the
company of your ordinary friends and get involved in
activities which genuinely interest you. Like attracts
like- be happy and unselfish if you wish to attract a
happy and considerate partner.